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Building Your Own Self-Esteem

Modern society is experiencing a crisis of low self-esteem.  Numerous studies have found that our use of social media has led to an uptick of negative self-worth, depression, anxiety and feelings of ‘not measuring up.’ 

I think most of us suffer greatly because we do not trust ourselves. While much of our self-hatred seems to come from a feeling of ‘not being good enough,’ even deeper than that, I think the crux of our discomfort comes from not trusting ourselves. 

Instead of thinking, “Why don’t good things happen to me? What am I doing wrong? What is the matter with me?” we will deeply trust and believe that our choices are right for us. That our career path is unfolding as it should. That our relationship is secure. And that even if something were to go wrong or if we were to be unhappy with our situations, we would have the strength, grace and grit to handle the issue. We will trust ourselves. We will know our own power. We will rest confidently in our innate abilities, and in the knowledge that each difficulty we encounter is an invitation from the universe for soul-growth. 

In my ebook, You’re Not Crazy, You’re Just Ascending, I talk about raising your own frequency and how it will improve your relationship with yourself and others. A big part of building your own self-esteem is trusting your intuition.  Here are some ways you can begin to trust your own gut and build your self-esteem:

Make amends with your inner child.
You have an internal child within you that has endured countless years of being shamed, ignored, and harmed. You cannot listen to your own intuition and access your deep knowledge unless you first make amends with this inner child, as this little ball of light within you is where you will find that very wisdom. Yes, that person that you hate…the one who is weak, the one who cries too much, the one who gets scared, the one who acts ‘awkward,’ the one who needs, the one who isn’t satisfied with all the distractions and vices you offer. 

So I encourage you to begin your journey by first making amends with your inner child. Find a picture of yourself from childhood or from your awkward teen years. Hang that picture in a place of honor or on your bedside nightstand. (It’s best if it is a photograph of just you, with no one else in the frame). I want you to quietly spend at least 10-15 minutes in communion with that picture, imagining that past version of yourself is in the room with you. (After all, he is/she is, you just can’t see them.) How does the past you look? How do they behave? How do they smell? What mannerisms do they have? Try to bring that little you back into the present as much as you can. You might even make the invitation out loud: “Enter, little one. Enter.” 

Close your eyes and deeply feel how that past self comes to the forefront of your spirit. How does it feel to bring this child back to life? What thoughts or feelings come up for you? Pay close attention. Even the smallest shift in your physical self (a tingling in your hands, a feeling of warmth in your belly or an ache in your tailbone) are worth noting. Journal your emotions after you are through the exercise. Perform this inner child meditation at least two to three times for a week for several weeks, or for as long as it takes for you to begin to connect with that small, powerful spirit within you. 

Practice, practice, practice.
Now that you have begun to reclaim your connection to your inner child, your gut is going to be going off crazy! You might have thought you knew what intuition was before, but after performing this inner child meditation several times, you are going to find that your internal voice is louder and more opinionated than you ever realized! It’s going to be hard to trust that voice at first. You might not want to ‘risk’ listening to your intuition when it comes to a big financial decision or a monumental life change. But, you can start to build your faith in yourself by practicing with your intuition for small decisions. How so?

Try not planning ahead for plans such as what you are going to order at a restaurant, what you are going to wear, what route you will take to work, or what you will say to a friend over dinner. Instead, let yourself be in the uncertainty of the moment, and then visualize yourself pulling up a chair for your inner self. Ask “What do I really want right now? What would most deeply serve me and nourish my needs?” You might find yourself making some very surprising decisions. Your intuition might lead you to bring up your experience with sobriety to a friend who really needed to experience that conversation at that moment. Your intuition might guide you to stay late at work and finish your project…thereby meaning you missed an accident on the rails. Your intuition might tell you to order a healthy meal for dinner instead of opting for pizza, meaning that you save yourself a bellyache later. 

Marvel at your inner power. Once you have begun to access your inner wisdom, listen to your intuition and make decisions off your gut, you will find that something amazing happens. You are no longer sitting in the passenger seat. You are empowered. You are trusting that the decisions you make are right for you. You don’t question your own choices when you see someone else enjoying great success. You don’t blame yourself when bad things happen to you. You don’t seek to take away from others’ happiness or justify your own vices or negative behavior. Instead, you are deeply aware of your own strength. Your own intelligence. Your own purpose. Your own journey. 

To learn more about how to sharpen your intuition and build your own self-image, you can read my newest ebook You’re Not Crazy, You’re just Ascending where I explore intuition and delve deep into Ascension Syndrome to explain how this mass awakening is impacting all our lives. I’ll help you identify and learn how to manage the unexplained physical, mental and emotional symptoms you may already be experiencing from it.Most importantly: Listen to my latest podcast. In this week’s episodes of  The Language of Love Session and Language of Love Bite , I get into the importance of positive genital self-image and learning to recognize when your past may be causing your insecurities in your current relationship.

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