If I asked you to sit down and tell me about your relationship, what would you focus on in your sharing? Would you tell me you’ve been feeling disconnected? You are too busy to have sex? Your partner cheated on you five years ago with his co-worker? Would you tell me about some oftheir annoying habits?
Or, if you are single and looking for love, would you tell me all about how there are no good ones out there? Men are intimidated by you? Everyone’s looking for a booty call and no one’s looking for love?
Well, all those things might be true for you right now. You might be feeling dejected in your search for love. You might be feeling tired of your partner’s habits or bored with your sex life. But if I have learned one thing from quantum physics it is this: Telling me about what you don’t want isn’t going to get you anywhere. Quantum physics teaches us that energy follows intention. In my new eBook, You’re Not Crazy, You’re Just Ascending, I talk about how your energetic frequency impacts your external circumstances and ways to elevate your frequency to start seeing the changes in your life that you desire.
Quantum Physics teaches us that where attention goes, energy flows. If you wake up every day and think, “The world sucks and I am never going to be happy,” then the world is going to suck and you aren’t going to be happy. It’s not magic. It’s simple physics.
Like attracts like, and in that mind set of “the good ones are taken,” “love never lasts, “my partner will never change,” etc you are making yourself a frequency match to that reality. Your stories create your (conscious and unconscious) feelings, and your feelings create an energetic frequency in you that emanates out from your body to the quantum field where all potentials lie. What manifests as your reality is a frequency match to the energetic frequency of your thoughts and feelings. This is the law of quantum physics.
So, are you ready to take charge of your love life by changing the energy within you and between you? Here are some ways to change the current energy of your relationship:
Create Quantum Love Goals
When you talk about your relationship, you need to talk not only about what you DO want (amazing sex, unconditional love) in a goal-oriented way, but also in an emotional and energetic way. Most importantly, how do you want to feel when you wake up in the morning? How do you want to experience the world with your partner? How do you want to feel when you go on dates and look for love? These are your Quantum Love goals. Hang one or two of your favorites on the bathroom mirror, or even write them on your hand. Hang them by the stove, so you can look at them as you cook, or by the sink, so you can look at them while you wash dishes.
Acquit vs. Convict
One common problem I see with couples is that they look to ‘convict’ each other rather than to ‘acquit’ each other. In other words, they look for all the ways that their partner is letting them down. For you, it could mean that you look for all the ways that your partner isn’t being romantic. Maybe you even compare your partner to unrealistic images from romantic movies, or maybe you see your friend bragging about her romantic spouse on Facebook and you allow that to change your opinion of your own relationship for the worse.”
Shift from Scarcity to Abundance
In my book, Quantum Love: Use Your Body’s Atomic Energy to Create the Relationship You Desire, I examine how Quantum Love will be so much more available to you if you shift from scarcity to abundance. If there is a gap between your desired relationship reality and your actual reality, try to determine where the gap exists in you. This takes a lot of honesty and authentic insight into yourself. In other words, it is a question you should be asking your essential self. Ground yourself and open your heart and then ask your essential self: “Where am I feeling scarcity?”
The key is to stay in the core desired relationship feeling rather than in the evidence of its absence. You will not only be happier, but will have such an easier time creating what you want in love as a result. You can hear more in this week’s Language of Love Session.