This episode of “The Language of Love” is all about mismatched libidos and what to do when you and your partner don’t have the same level of desire. Mismatched libidos are one of the most common issues that couples face and it often leads to the end of relationships, so this very special episode can be invaluable in helping to preserve your marriage and your sexual pleasure.
First, a woman asks for help restoring her lost libido, as her sex drive tanked after she began anti-depressants. Anti-depressants are notorious for sexual side effects, yet they are invaluable in treating depression and anxiety. Luckily, it is possible to continue taking your medications without sacrificing passion and pleasure. Dr. Berman offers advice for how to sex-proof your relationship even when you are taking SSRIs and other psychiatric medications, as well as how to talk to your partner about your decreased libido and help them to still feel loved and desired even when you are not in the mood.
Then, a caller reaches out because her husband is rarely interested in sex, and when they do have intimacy, he seems distracted and stressed out. She is eager to have more sex, but not if he is doing so out of duress and his heart isn’t really in it. But could it be that his history of ED is making him scared to have sex? Dr. Berman discusses how erectile dysfunction can make men afraid to engage in intimacy, even if they actually desire sex because they fear appearing less masculine or displeasing their partner. Over time, this becomes problematic because the less sex you have, the more accustomed you will be to not having it, decreasing your libido and harming your sexual response.
So how can this couple get their sex life back on track and help to decrease his fear of performance issues?