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Let Your Freak Flag Fly!

The truth is, I come from a long line of weirdos. But starting with just my parents, my mom was a beautiful, deep, awkward mess who was plagued by social anxiety. It also didn’t help that she didn’t have a filter, and what she thought came right out of her mouth (yes, I know, it seems to be hereditary). My father was a colorectal surgeon who had a penchant for regaling his dinner guests with stories of the most unusual things he’d pulled out of people’s behinds. Ok, if you must know, it was a light bulb, and he was so proud to have removed it intact that he got a nurse to screw it into a lamp to see if it worked. It did.

I was constantly called weird growing up, especially when my parents moved us to a small island off the southeast coast of Georgia, smack dab in the middle of the Baptist Bible Belt. Evidently, the whole town knew we were coming and was excited to meet the new Jewish family from the big city. On my first day of school, one girl asked me why I didn’t have horns and a tail (I’m not kidding)! But beyond the bullying over my heritage, I was a kid who just didn’t fit the mold. Cyndi Lauper was my style guide, rather than the Preppy Handbook my friends were following. I preferred reading and fishing in the tidal marshes to gossip and partying. Thanks to my parents, I learned to embrace my weirdness. Years later, when my own kids would complain that someone called them weird, I said to them the same thing my parents said to me: “What’s wrong with being weird? Normal is boring.”

And frankly, normal is boring to me. It’s limiting and built around judgment and fear of fitting some ideal that no one really reaches. When I decided to seek specialization in sex therapy while in graduate school, there were few to no models to follow. But I couldn’t stand that the couples I was seeing had so many sexual issues, and none of my professors could guide me (they thought I was weird too for asking)! As I pieced together a program of study for myself and talked my way into medical school fellowships in sexual dysfunction, one of my college friends asked me if I wasn’t worried about people thinking I was weird. It was at that moment I realized my weirdness served me. I was grateful for never fitting into the mold of “normal.” It allowed me to not only think outside the box but live there. And it’s one of the main secrets to my success.

In the spirit of encouraging you to embrace your weirdness, here are 10 reasons why being weird is actually a good thing:

  1. Authenticity is Magnetic: When you’re true to your unique self, you attract the right kind of people into your life—those who appreciate and value you for who you really are. Being weird means you’re not hiding behind a mask or pretending to fit in, which makes your connections with others more genuine and fulfilling.
  2. Creative Expression Flourishes: Weirdness is often where creativity lives. Thinking and acting outside of the norm allows you to come up with fresh ideas, solve problems in innovative ways, and approach life with a different perspective. Many of the world’s greatest artists, inventors, and thinkers were considered weird because they saw things differently.
  3. Freedom from Conformity: Embracing your weirdness frees you from the pressure to conform to society’s expectations. This freedom allows you to explore your interests, passions, and dreams without worrying about what others think. You give yourself permission to live a life that feels true to you.
  4. Inspiring Others to Be Themselves: When you fully accept your own weirdness, you give others the courage to do the same. People who see you confidently being yourself are often inspired to let go of their own inhibitions and express their true selves. It creates a ripple effect that encourages authenticity in those around you.
  5. Innovation and Progress Come from Weirdness: Most significant advancements in technology, science, and art have come from people who dared to be weird and think differently. It’s the ones who ask unusual questions, challenge the status quo, and follow unconventional paths who bring about real change and progress in the world.
  6. Life Becomes More Fun and Interesting: Embracing your weirdness makes life more enjoyable. When you’re not afraid to be quirky, laugh at yourself, or do things differently, you add a sense of playfulness and curiosity to your day-to-day experience. Life becomes less about following the rules and more about creating your own adventure.
  7. Resilience in the Face of Judgment: Being weird helps you develop resilience because it requires a certain level of self-acceptance to stand out from the crowd. When you embrace your uniqueness, you become more comfortable with who you are, which makes you less affected by criticism or judgment from others.
  8. You Discover Your True Tribe: Being authentically weird helps you find your “tribe”—the people who love you for your quirks, eccentricities, and all the things that make you different. These connections are often deeper and more meaningful because they’re based on a genuine understanding and acceptance of each other’s uniqueness.
  9. You Live More Boldly: When you let your weirdness shine, you start to care less about making mistakes or looking foolish. You become more willing to take risks, try new things, and explore parts of yourself and the world that you might otherwise shy away from. This boldness leads to growth, self-discovery, and sometimes even amazing opportunities.
  10. The World Needs More Weirdness: The world is enriched by the variety of perspectives, talents, and ideas that come from people who aren’t afraid to be different. Your weirdness is your superpower—it’s what sets you apart and what you have to offer that no one else can. Being weird is a way of making your unique mark on the world.
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