In today’s modern world, women do it all. From running successful businesses to raising kids to keeping a Martha Stewart-esque home, women have a million things on their plate, and this means plenty of stress. It also means that these successful “type A” can be a little bit controlling. It comes with the territory—when you have to do it all, you learn how to be on top of everything and everyone.
If this sounds familiar, you are not alone. Running a tight ship makes you talented at your job and it makes you an awesome mom, but it also means that you have hard time letting go of control and being in the moment.
Some women even have trouble letting go and enjoy sex or time with their partner, as they feel the need to control every moment or make everything perfect. Date nights are not fun and relaxing, they become all about making it to the dinner reservation on time and ordering the perfect entrée for you…and your partner.
There is a way to stop these controlling date night behavior in its tracks, through a“surrender date.” A surrender date requires that you give up control and sit back and relax. The gist of it is this: your partner agrees to do all of the planning, and you agree to go along for the ride. This helps you to let go and relax, and it helps him to stand up and assert some authority in a safe, sexy way.
But, in order for it to work, each of you really has to hold up your end of the bargain.
First and perhaps most important, the surrender date planner does everything from start to finish. He picks out your clothes and jewelry (and even your underwear!), decides when and where you’re going, and takes charge of all the logistics, such as transportation and money. The first time you go on a surrender date, it may feel a little too scary to give up all that control—but that’s the point.
A surrender date isn’t just some kitschy idea that you’ll be bored within five minutes. It really shakes up your routine and your relationship. A little bit of pressure helps to inspire creativity in your partner and a stronger sense of trust in you.
As for what to do, the options are endless. You may choose to relive a past date or try a new adventure. You can challenge yourself to try something new, like taking tennis lessons or joining a aerial yoga class, or seek out comedy clubs or blues joints that you might not have considered before. The more adventurous your dating life, the more excited and intimate you will be as a couple.
In addition, giving up control can be incredibly exhilarating, which is something that few women think about. Putting timeworn activities and roles to rest is a good thing. Surrender dates introduce new sensations and pleasures to your love life, which is a necessary part of keeping your spark alive.